Published November 12, 2024
BY DANIELLE LEGARE
Dating over 50: GSE alumna empowers women with new book
University at Buffalo Graduate School of Education alumna Kelly Devine, MS ’22, recently wrote and self-published the book, “Jaded and Dating: The Definitive Guide to Finding a Partner for a Moment or a Lifetime for Women Over 50.” The book offers insights and advice to help women gain confidence and find happiness while navigating the complexities of modern dating later in life.
Devine, who writes under the pseudonym Gracie O’Devin, drew from her personal experiences with dating and rediscovering herself after her husband passed away in 2014. “When he passed away, I found myself as a 51-year-old woman who had always had a career. And at that time, my son was 17. I didn’t know what I was going to do with myself. I was kind of lost,” Devine said.
It didn’t take long before she came up with a plan.
When her son left for college, Devine decided to do the same, investing her time and resources in her education. “I found that school was a new challenge—and I always like a challenge.” She arrived at GSE to pursue the rehabilitation counseling master’s and mental health counseling advanced certificate programs. During that time, the idea for “Jaded and Dating” began brewing.
Devine knew she wanted to share her experiences meeting people online and in person and encourage others to consider their safety and expectations for dating and relationship building. “I have learned the importance of honesty and just telling people what you’re expecting and what you want out of the relationship,” she said. “Are you looking for a friends-with-benefits relationship? Are you looking to get married? What are you looking for?
Devine jotted down her idea for the book on a Post-it note and stuck it to her computer monitor. It served as a daily reminder to bring her dream to life—which she was finally able to do in 2022 when she took the summer off from classes to focus on writing.
Since its release in October 2022, “Jaded and Dating” has received positive feedback from readers—not only from women but also from men, expanding its impact beyond its intended audience.
Apart from “Jaded and Dating,” Devine has authored other notable books, including “Argument Hacks: Tips on How to Communicate with Your Partner Effectively During a Fight.”
Her educational and professional experiences, coupled with her desire to help people, fuel her passion for writing.
Reflecting on her time at GSE, Devine fondly recalls an impactful curriculum focused on cultural competency in counseling—coursework that she describes as a “defining moment in the program.” Kathleen M. Conroy, retired clinical associate professor of counseling, school and educational psychology, also made a lasting impression on Devine. “She’s amazing—so laid back, but when you had an issue, the switch was flipped, and she offered the most mind-blowing guidance,” she said.
Devine’s dedication and problem-solving skills also left an impression on Conroy.
“I remember the day I met Kelly like it was yesterday and immediately believed that she was going to be an outstanding student. As her faculty advisor, it was an honor to work with her throughout her time in the rehabilitation counseling program at UB,” said Conroy. “She was always ready to dig deep into a topic or clinical issue to find options and solutions. I am confident that the information in Kelly’s book will be a helpful resource with the potential to help others in many ways.”
While Devine’s journey at UB concluded in 2023, she continues to champion the quality of education she received, enthusiastically recommending the university to friends considering career changes or furthering their education later in life. “Go back to UB. You need to check out UB,” she has told friends and family. “It’s the place!”
Alongside her counseling practice, Devine also operates an Etsy store.
And she continues to write.
She is working on two upcoming projects, “Co-dependency First Aid” and “Tough Act to Follow: How to Build Emotional Intimacy and Resiliency.”
“I am going to keep doing what I do. I have a lot of big ideas, and I have a lot of goals,” she said.
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